Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Technology- only as smart as it's owner-

yea- that's right.

I got this super super cool watch for my birthday! First let me give you a little bit of back story. A girl I stand next to in my Step class has this really cool watch- it counts her calories and keeps her heart rate and all that kind of good stuff. And since she is skinny and real cute and I want to be just like her- I just had to get me one of those watches!
Because having the watch will make me skinny- right?

yea- just like buying the P90-X videos will make me all muscley right?

what? that's not how it works?

anywhooo-

I mention the watch to my Dad- who says he wants to get it for my birthday and wa-la a couple of weeks later I am nose into the "Quick Start Guide" and on my way to my 1st workout with The Watch.

And yes it deserves capitals, and yes it deserves bold- because I mean- this Watch is kinda like my Ruler- I mean- what it says goes. If it tells me to work  harder- then I should. And if it tells me to take it easy- they hey- I will. And if it tells me that I burned enough calories to enjoy some pizza and beer- then you know what- I am just going to do what it tells me to do.

Ok- so I enter in all my personal information- and do you know what The Watch tells me??

You're overweight.

ah- thanks butthole- that's pretty much why I got you in the 1st place. So I can be skinny like the girl next to me in class- duh. Don't need The Watch to tell me that- I have mirrors.

Then I head to Body Combat- which is a kickboxing class- so I am happy to take out some of my frustration in class and not on The Watch. So I work my butt off- I am kicking serious butt- and sweating like crazy- don't mess with me! I want to prove to The Watch that I can work hard and I can burn a lot of calories- just watch out you Watch!

and then guess what??

The Watch tells me that I burned 0 yup- ZERO big fat ZERO calories.

hmpf- that must have been the problem all this time. I mean working out and sweating all so hard- only to burn ZERO calories- no wonder I'm not loosing any weight.

a;wklsg;akr;l oweir;welnkfa;dflgneortjha;wrj- stupid watch!

so take 2 with The Watch. Today about half way through my weight lifting class- after the hardest part of the work out- squats, legs trembling, I need a break and I look down at The Watch to see what it thinks- maybe it will tell me to take it easy...yea right.

Then I see it- I realize..... ohhhhhh you have to push the "start workout" button.

Nice.

1 comment:

  1. please share the name of this magical bitch of a watch!

    ReplyDelete